![]() “When we observed the antidepressant effects of ketamine, we were shocked by the rapidity and magnitude of its antidepressant effects,” Krystal says. Krystal began studying the drug, he thought its effects on cognition and behavior seemed profound. John Krystal, MD, a psychiatrist at Yale School of Medicine, is credited with spearheading research into ketamine as a treatment for depression in 2000, when he and his team led the first randomized trial on depressed patients. But when doctors noticed that some depressed patients who had been given ketamine as anesthesia for routine procedures experienced relief from their symptoms, study of its cognitive effects on animals, and, eventually, humans, began. Food and Drug Administration (FDA) in 1970 for use as an anesthetic, according to a research article. The Origins of Ketamine as a Treatment for Major Depressionįirst synthesized in 1962, ketamine was approved by the U.S. Then, I decided to try ketamine-assisted therapy. So my depression had become a financial and professional liability on top of the acute pain and utter exhaustion it caused. Whereas before I would have one major episode every one to two years, I began to have them every five to six months.Īs a freelance writer, I find it’s nearly impossible to create during a major depressive episode - my brain is unable to focus or think critically. ![]() Between the end of my marriage in 2018 and COVID-19 lockdown in 2020, I had a rough couple of years, to say the least - my episodes started to multiply and appear closer together. ![]() Then, slowly, the effects wear off and I’m back to feeling anxious and depressed.Īccording to the National Bureau of Economic Research (NBER), middle age is a notoriously unhappy time for many people, and my situational depressive episodes are prompted by stressful events. I've found they all help stabilize my mood at first. I’ve been off and on antidepressants (SSRIs) since my early thirties, starting with Lexapro, then Prozac, then a cocktail of Prozac plus Wellbutrin. Crying remains my constant companion, and at my lowest, tears fall as soon as I wake up. I continue to feel crippling emotions that register physically in my solar plexus (the energetic chakra located above the navel, described in ayurveda), along with frightening, sinking sensations in my gut. ![]() The next day, I’d white-knuckle it through classes - quieter, flatter, and sadder than my usually bubbly, extroverted self - then, I’d sob alone in my room that evening.Īlmost 30 years later, my depression looks similar. Tears started and wouldn’t stop until I cried myself to sleep. My first depressive episode occurred during my senior year of high school, characterized by a constant ache of paralyzing emotions. Chronic depression has loomed in the background of my entire adult life. ![]()
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